Passion and intense emotions are enlivening to the person without BPD, who finds being alone depressing or experiences healthy people as boring.Codependents already have low self-esteem and poor boundaries, so they placate, accommodate, and apologize when attacked in order to maintain the emotional connection in the relationship.Unlike bipolar disorder, their moods shift quickly and aren’t a departure from their normal self. Their emotions, behavior, and unstable relationships, including work history, reflect a fragile, shame-based self-image.This is often marked by sudden shifts, sometimes to the extent that they feel nonexistent. Thus, they’re dependent on others and may frequently seek advice from several people about the same question on the same day.Use of medication and DBT, CBT, and some other modalities have proven helpful.Borderlines need structure, and a combination of knowing that they’re cared about and firm boundaries communicated calmly. Studies have shown that some people recover on their own, some improve with weekly therapy, and some require hospitalization.People who have a first-degree relative with BPD are five times more likely to develop BPD themselves.
They seek someone to provide stability and balance their changeable emotions.To do so, they try to control with commands or manipulation, including flattery and seduction.Whereas narcissists enjoy being understood, too much understanding frightens the borderline.So it is not easy having a personality disorder, and I hope you can see why these behaviours can stop you from dating. We all have issues that we need to work continuously on.Having BPD doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve to be in a loving and committed relationship.